Dear Sirs,

Yes, I am referring to you. You in the white early 90's model Chrysler minivan. You who honked at me to get my attention and then gave me a very, very cheesy "Heeeeeyyyy girrrrl!" smile and wave, at which point I switched immediately into "IGNORE!!!1!1!!1!" mode. While I appreciate the compliment--that you found me beautiful, or at least my face, at least in profile--I do not appreciate the manner in which you went about expressing your appreciation of my beauty. Such boldness, such a tactless approach, is not the way to win a lovely lady's heart. I assure you, I certainly never considered rolling down my window to "holla back" at you. The very manner in which you went about seeking my attention assured me at the outset that you are not the man for whom I have waited these past twenty-five years. I will certainly not cheapen the relationship experience with the likes of you--who cannot be bothered to know a woman's character before attempting to know her body.

I do hope, at some point, you come to a knowledge of our beautiful Saviour, and that you elect to serve Him all of your days. Until then, I bid thee [a hopefully permanent] farewell.

Sincerely,

One who shall not share with you her name.